Drama queen. (*  ̄︿ ̄)

22:59

Yes, drama drama and more drama. This is what happened during these few weeks. I cannot tell this to anyone cause it will just cause more problem and I don't want any problems anymore.

Okay, remember the guy I blogged about, I said I will move on and not look back ? Yeah about him... I kind of looked back. I guessed I haven't moved on and neither has he, or is he just trying to play with my feelings ? Idk but okay this is what happened.

I told my friend that he still fancy(like boy girl relationship like those kinda way if you didn't know what fancy meant) me but don't want to go out with me cause I was getting confused and I needed to let it out on someone so I told one of my friend. So my friend can't stand people like him like people who tell they fancy them but don't want to go out with them so she went to scold him and have a go at him telling him that he shouldn't tell someone you fancy them and not go out with them and then she called him a 'player'. I know him well and 'player' this word, this is the first word you want to say to him if you want him to get mad with you. Then later on the evening he went on facebook and scold me and say I shouldn't have told my friend that so that she wouldn't have a go at him. Okay so I apologised and asked for a chance. So I asked what would make up for it, and we just chat it through and then at the end he just ignores me and just went off line and off his phone and everything. DO YOU KNOW HOW MAD I WAS ? DO YOU KNOW HOW WORRIED I WAS ?

Then the next day of school I wouldn't tahan his ignorance so I told another friend what happened. But you know this friend -.- I thought I could trust him but you know what, he just blab everything I told him to another guy and these two guys just spread everything everywhere. I was like WTF are you doing ? I told you to keep it as a secret but you end up telling everyone ? HOW THE FUCK AM I GONNA TELL YOU SECRETS ANYMORE? HUH? YOU TELL ME THIS.

I was into the stage to begging him to be my friend after this. I even cried in lesson telling to this guy that was very close with the guy I like, I messed everything up. And he said everything will be fine. It's not fine okay. It's not.

He sent me a message saying other stuff and he said I should move on and find another one because I can. DUDE. He was the one that couldn't move on. He was the one looking back and flirting with me in the first place. Why am I always the one end up crying for him ? Who the fuck does he think he is.

So a day after, he just talked it through about not making him block me while his last words was leave him alone , so I did , I left my facebook and didn't reply and went to tesco's. And guess what ? He sent me a text telling me that I am blocked . I was like WTF ? You told me to leave you alone but you block me ? Oh why don't you just block me straight away rather than being a drama queen making me argue with you ? WHY ? YOU MAD BRO ?

He just said 'after what you put me through not even friends'. I should have said that to him but I was blind by the so called 'love'. I shouldn't have looked back at all. After what he had put me through, I realise I shouldn't have look back. You wanna be my friend ? I welcome you. If you don't it's up to you. I am starting to have this attitude. I am fucking tired of begging and pleasing people so they would be my friend. Like william ? Remember him ? He just dumped me for another girl and now, our friendship is gone . In just a day, yup, a day, it's all gone. Yeah I do still leave a couple of likes and comments on his facebook but that's it. I moved on and I don't actually have any feelings but I still can't let go he dumped me cause of this so called girl who goes to water polo (not judging k) but he thinks I still like him in that sort of way but I find it funny that he thinks like that. I thought he knows me well enough to think I'm not that kind of person once I calmed down from the drama well, I guess not -.- Oh wait, no one understands me. He still pretends that nothing happened with us and he still pretends that he doesn't know me. I find it kind of childish. Boys, all childish in a way. No offence. I just hate guys who can't doesn't want to be friends after break ups. I JUST HATE. YOLO. I am sure girls who has ex's like mine would understand how I feel.

Now this guy I totally love deeply from my heart blocked me on facebook and ignores me in school. I just go back home and think and think and think . I worry and worry and worry until I can't be bothered with studies cause I have bloody no mood for anything. And guess what ? My exam is next week. Who does he think I am ? Make my mood bad on my revision week and make me fail my exam ? Oh wait , he doesn't care cause it's my fault for not studying not his. He doesn't fucking care so why should I ? I can just be like myself two weeks before this happen . DON'T LOOK BACK NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS AND MOVE ON.  MOVE ON. MOVE ON. FOCUS ON STUDIES! FIGHTING! FIGHTING! FIGHTING! ╭(′▽‵)╭(′▽‵)╭(′▽‵)╯ 

You know what ? There is this pe lesson, I was just standing on the corner of the badminton court and he just smashed a freaking shuttlecock on my waist. I was in pain until I cried =.= okay only for a minute it wasn't as pain as getting stabbed and guess what ? he didn't even said sorry.  (*  ̄︿ ̄)

My sister said he blatantly still likes me. Hahahaha , I don't think so after what happened. If he still like me, he would have forgiven me and give me a chance.

I know there are my mistakes but he also has mistakes. He shouldn't have just said he still fancy me but not go out with me. I don't want to be in the middle okay if you don't want to move on that quick at least tell me. All you need to do is just TALK AND EXPLAIN. I will listen, it's not that I would eat you up or anything okay =.= This is one thing I don't like about him, he always keeps his feelings to himself and not tell me how he actually feel. ( ̄ω ̄)

Lesson learned, don't tell anyone your secrets. It's not worth it. Better keep it to yourself or your blog. Like here, I'm telling you now but you have to keep a secret. okay ? I don't want to make any problems with him anymore. I already made both of us unhappy. I don't want to make anything worse. I give up already. Thank you for wasting your time on reading this entry. I appreciate that you are still reading until the end.

Yeah I took a break off facebook , I need to study and not get distracted.

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